In no particular order

1. It's boring

Write in corporate-speak…feature a photo of your building…display a huge logo…talk to me like I'm a business, not a person. I've read pharmaceutical disclaimers more interesting.

2. It's not targeted

You think EVERYBODY needs your product/service? I'll have some of what you're smoking!

3. You get it.

You thought of it. You designed it. You built it. You live with it every day. I have no idea what it is.

4. You're inconsistent

Hey, I got your big mass-mailing today. Didn't I hear from you about six months ago, too?

5. You gave up too soon.

Man, I could really use your help on this new project. Why did you stop marketing to me six months ago?

6. It's not about you.

Yes, I can see by YOUR ads, website, emails, and letters that YOU are awesome. YOUR products and services are way cool. YOU'VE been in business for 193 years. I hear about YOU, YOU, YOU. But what about MY problems? MY challenges? MY business?

7. It's just like everybody else's.

You're different? Really? Then why are you using the same marketing tools that look exactly the same as all your competition? I guess I'll just go with the lowest price.

8. You're not asking me to do anything.

Yes, I'm aware of you. Is that it or is there something you want me to do?

9. Your evidence is weak or nonexistent.

Look, you're SUPPOSED to tell me how great you, your product, and your service are. Besides you, though, is there someone else who will tell me the same thing?

Oh, and did I tell you your marketing is boring?